Happy New Year 2013

Hard to believe another year has passed... It seems just yesterday I was sitting at this same laptop, typing up a list of goals I had set out in January 2011! I seem to have missed the list in 2012.... January is one of my favorite times of the year when everything seems so fresh and new; our slate is wiped clean and things seem so much more attainable. The beginning of school has a similar feel but that often stresses me out more with the pressure of new teachers and the school supply list that grows every year.

This year has started like most – I tackled closets: thinning and purging for all three of us the things we've outgrown or just won't wear anymore. I (finally!) cleaned off the laundry room counter and found a place to put all the charging stations for the various cordless tools. And, what was the biggest chore on my list became one of the best afternoons: cleaning out the garage. I put both kiddos to work, initially to a litany of complaints, sweeping and sorting all their outdoor toys. What was initially the most daunting of the cleanup – taking apart our old soccer goal – became the most eye opening. I pulled the goal out and handed my boy a box of tools (the rotten net had gone several months before but the rusted nuts were too time consuming on my first attempt). He promptly set to work finding the right tool and enlisting his sister to hold the pliers when things needed it. He managed to safely dismantle the frame and then together they cleaned everything up. I was so impressed by his maturity and diligence – not quitting when the right tool was hard to find or yelling at his sister when she tried to help. My lesson – he is growing up and ready to handle more responsibility (and needs to be challenged like this more often). I might have to invest in a safer/lighter lawnmower soon and hand that job off to him, too!!

In addition to all the purging and cleaning I've been pondering my goals for the next year and am surprised at how similar the themes are to the ones I set two years ago...

Spend more time with God – reading and focusing on His plans for us

Focus on our health – making time for the dentist, checkups and various things that get pushed back between work and other demands

Encourage the kiddos to see their strengths and make more time for fun

Continue to save in preparation for 2014's big challenge of retirement

I'll try to keep you all posted on our progress.... So far we are 12 days into the new year and things seem to be shaping up pretty darn well!!

Thanksgiving 2012

On this cloudy and cool Colorado morning I am enjoying some quiet time with a cup of coffee, counting all that I have to be thankful for.

The kiddos are growing strong and happy. After my boy's health scare and surgery this summer I honestly didn't know what the holidays would look like for us. And here he is – begging me for a ski day tomorrow!! My girl continues to adjust to the challenges of middle school – making new friends and learning the trials of group work. Both excelled on their fall sports' teams – the boy leading the statistics on his baseball team and the girlie consistently ruling the soccer game at mid-field.

As you sit down around your food-laden table today I hope you are able to celebrate the time together, and remember those who are far from home today. I am thankful to be spending the day surrounded by my children and our good friends – part of the awesome community we are so blessed with.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!

Time on my Hands

Rare occurrence for me this week – time on my hands... I tend to be in constant motion – between kids' activities and my own schedule we so rarely have time to just do nothing for long periods of time. This week is the school Fall Break (something we never did growing up but we very much enjoy now!) and for the last two years the kids and I have gone exploring around the area. One year we went to Estes Park and hiked in Rocky Mountain National Park; last year we visited a good friend in the Vail area and biked, hiked and explored her new stomping grounds. This year – the kiddos spent time with their dad, which left me with time on my hands.... Yes, I could have canceled my vacation time and headed to work (this would have been my nurse's first choice as her workload increases considerably if I am not there) but instead I decided to attempt some time just for me.

Day one was easy to fill – I spent much needed time with my college roommate. She lives just an hour away but we rarely manage more than a visit every 6 months or so. We talked non-stop for the afternoon and barely touched on all the topics that needed covering. She is one of those people in my life that I can go months without seeing and we pick up the conversation almost right where it was left off... Day two was easy too – well, until dinner time. I spent much of the day with another friend – baking and doing little chores that seem to be easier with a friend. But as dinner time rolled around it was hard to consider cooking for one; and how to fill those hours between dinner and bed – hours normally spent in homework or breaking up fights over the remote...

As the week has rolled on I became introspective over these empty hours. We as a culture are often so busy that unscheduled time becomes scary. I found myself feeling like I still needed to fill those hours with productive activity – cleaning the grill, preparing the patio for winter, typing a blog post... And I felt guilty if I chose to just sit in the sun and read my book (maybe not too guilty – I have a sunburn to show for that “lazy time”). So rarely do we take the time to just be still, to take in what is happening around us, and to reflect rather that react.

In the long run I am sure I will pay a price next week when I return to work with all the things that will be waiting for me... But as the week winds down I am thankful for this time of quiet, unscheduled activity before we go into the Holiday rush, before ski season starts and we are back on the run. Now, all that said – time to get moving – there is laundry to get started, errands to run, homework to accomplish...

Simple Acts of Kindness

I have a confession to make... I am a softie at heart. Please don't let my kids know – they think I am tough, the enforcer of all rules and responsible for squashing all fun....

In truth – TV commercials and sappy songs on the radio bring tears to my eyes, and those little stories people post on Face Book can make or break my day.

Recently I shared one of those little FB stories with my 11 year old girlie. We've all read it – the one about the boy carrying all his books home on a Friday afternoon after school who is befriended by the popular “jock”. The two go on to become lifelong friends and the first boy eventually admits he had planned to commit suicide that weekend they first met. The simple act of kindness and friendship, unknowingly offered by the “jock”, changed the course of this young man's life. I read the post to my girlie in hopes of reminding her how little things we do through the day can affect people; how a simple smile or helping to pick up a dropped item can lift someone in ways we may never know. As she navigates the waters of middle school and concerns of popularity can overshadow studies I don't want her to lose her kind heart that has shinned so brightly all these years.

Yesterday was “Make a Difference Day” - a day to volunteer, to reach out to the community, to serve those in need. I love the concept but shouldn't every day be a day to reach out? I know – it isn't practical to have a coat drive every day or serve at a soup kitchen on your lunch hour. But simple acts of kindness incorporated into everyday are easy – and you never know how it might affect the life of another (or even your own...).

101 Days of Summer Comes to an End

As so often seems to happen in these busy times it has (once again) been forever since I have posted to this page...  All I can say is we have been living life and lately it has left little time for writing about life.

 

The summer has flown by - today is Labor Day, the traditional end to summer, day number 101.  In reflection, it has been three months of worry and stress followed by a few weeks of rest, then a return to our typical 100 mph speed.

 

The start of summer was consumed with preparation for my boy's surgery.  He had his heart repaired on 22 June and by 22 August he was back to playing baseball and launching himself off his bike ramp.  I still cringe when he competes with his best buddies for "most air" but know he is strong and healed.  I would love to wrap him in a bubble but know that he would be miserable - life in his estimation is meant to be lived going full throttle.  He has started 4th grade and has set his goal on reading 1 Million words by the end of the school year (and well on his way at over 115K so far!).

 

Our mid summer was spent with my girl in training for a new soccer team.  She had played for a large corporate club based near our house with satellite clubs all around the front range and the size was becoming a barrier for true player development.  So, she tried out for a smaller club, made the team, then did both a soccer camp and a speed/running camp.  Saturdays are now spent driving the "soccer shuttle" all over the place (one drawback to leaving the big club is we are now in a more independent league - and going further afield for games).  She also started middle school and seems to be flourishing in the independence.

 

For me, fall brings the realization that I have just two years left in the Air Force - two years that I am sure will speed by.  I am starting to think of life after the military, looking at securing my Colorado licence and networking a little for jobs.  The Air Force has done a great job of training me to be an NP, a leader, and in some cases a follower but does little to train us professionals on how to find employment once our time is done. 

 

All deep thinking and worry aside, this weekend has been spent in celebration of all the joy and strength we have in our community - sleepovers and play dates, happy hours and dinners with friends, live music and long runs.  So much to be thankful for and so much more on the horizon.

 

Happy Labor Day!!!

Waiting over, now real work begins

The time seemed to pass so slowly leading up to my boy’s surgery, and then the last two days flew by so fast! We spent last Thursday doing preoperative requirements–blood draw, chest X-ray, physical with the surgical team. All day long I was counting down in my mind: “In 24 hours, they will be wheeling him into the operating room. In 12 hours, we will be leaving for the hospital.” Thursday evening was pretty laid back, with visits from friends and time spent just being together. I let him pick his favorite for dinner, so we dined on soft-shell tacos and watermelon!

The morning of surgery, we headed for the hospital early, and things moved quickly from then on. Our pastor was there waiting for us, as well as my college roommate. (Yes, we both settled in this area, a thousand miles from Indiana where we met.) After some quiet time together, it was time for them to wheel my little boy away. That was the hardest part. I kept it together until he couldn’t see me anymore and then gave into a couple of tears. Even knowing he was in good hands, it was hard to watch him go. But the staff was wonderful, and we were updated several times during the procedure. I shed a few tears again—this time, tears of joy when we got word he was off bypass, and everything was working great. Five short—but very long—hours after he was wheeled away, we were at his bedside in the cardiac intensive care unit.

I didn’t recognize him at first; he was just so small in that big bed with all the monitors and IVs. Thankfully, he was extubated already and breathing well on his own. Throughout the rest of the day, he woke up occasionally, but it wasn't until Saturday that he really started to make progress. His chest tubes were removed that morning and, by afternoon, his central lines were pulled as well. He was up in a chair and sipping water before we knew it. And, surprisingly, he moved to the step-down unit that evening. Sunday was spent with visitors and coaxing my already picky eater to eat. Nothing sounded good on his upset tummy—poor boy—but, by Sunday evening, he was nibbling on strawberries and bread and, by Monday, was willing to eat some yogurt.

I was shocked on Monday when the staff wrote discharge orders. My first thought was, “There is no way I am ready to have this kid at home!” But they felt he would eat better and we would both rest better at home. (I had been sleeping at his bedside every night with just a few short breaks each day to get some fresh air.) I think I drove 10 miles under the speed limit the whole way home; my cargo just seemed so much more precious to me!

And now, two days later, he is eating better and walking almost like his normal self. (He has lost at least four pounds, though, and looks skeletal.) He is also getting sassy, a sure sign he is feeling better. I am still watching him like a hawk. As I write this, I am sitting in the same room he is, and I confess I slept the last two nights on the trundle bed in his room. I continue to entice him with all the foods I can think of—How long can a boy live on Otter Pops?—and we even ventured outside to water the flowers together this morning. Now I fear he is feeling too good, and it will be tough to keep him calm the next couple weeks. Already, he misses riding his bike and doing jumps on his scooter!

Wonderful friends and having my parents here has been instrumental in his quick healing. We have been wrapped in prayer, well fed, and his sister has been entertained, if you call soccer camp in 100-degree weather entertained! Thank you all for the support. We couldn't have made it this far this fast without each and every one of you!

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership (RNL), published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International. 

Boys will be boys!

“Mommy! Mommy!” I could hear my boy screaming, but couldn’t see him. Just seconds before, he had been swinging in a friend’s swing while we grown-ups relaxed on the patio. I looked at my friend. “Where is he?” I asked as we both stood up—and there he was, lying under the swing, on his belly with his arms folded under his body.

Apparently, his friend had dared him to jump out of the swing—on the back swing. (His sister also broke her arm while swinging. She was attempting to tie her shoe—another hard-learned lesson in gravity.) We ran over, brushed him off and all appeared fine. His left arm hurt all over, but he could move it, and there was no swelling, no apparent broken bones, We set him up on the couch with some ice and went back to relaxing.

The next day was pretty busy—church most of the morning and a Cub Scout barbecue in the afternoon. He was favoring the arm but not really complaining of pain, and it still wasn’t swollen. At the barbecue, the boys were to work on their athlete badges. Sit-ups, push-ups, a long jump and some running was involved.

My boy did great on everything but push-ups. He refused to put weight on his arm. So, off to Urgent Care we went, 30 minutes before they closed and—surprise—discovered the poor boy had a buckle fracture of his left radius. The good news? It wasn’t displaced, so surgery wasn’t needed and, once the arm was splinted, he really had no pain. The bad news? We were just 12 days out from his open-heart surgery!

Monday morning, I spoke to his surgical team, and we agreed that surgery could go as scheduled. If he has significant body swelling afterward, we can just have the cast removed. We also arranged to have the arm casted, and he is now sporting a purple “Rockies” cast. I have struggled to keep him grounded over the last week but, in typical boy fashion, he has tried to ride his bike, has been cruising the street on his scooter and has even hit baseballs. Maybe this is a sign of how his post-op recovery will go, and he will just bounce back to being the active little boy he’s always been!

The irony of this story: Last week, I was on call for our clinic, which involves being available for medical advice and approving all urgent-care requests. We are pretty cognizant of not providing care to our own family members. (It can be bad medicine, as providers sometimes lack objectivity when caring for those they love.) So, on Monday morning, I joked with our medical director: “If my kid breaks his arm while I’m on call, can I enter his urgent care referral?"

Yep, boys will be boys!

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership (RNL), published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International.