Saturday, March 9, 2013

The Lost Art of Selfishness

Selfishness is a lost art.... Not the selfishness that might first come to mind –spending money you don't have or making decisions that benefit one to the detriment of all. That concept of selfishness is something we need to purge from our society in general.

I am thinking of the kind of selfishness that most of us have given up in favor of selfLESSness.... The selfishness we need is the kind that allows time for family and time to ourselves; saying “no” to taking on one more project or hosting one more event... As moms (and even worse –working moms) we often think selflessness is the way of life and more is better – more sleepovers, more play dates, more sport participation. We forget sometimes saying no is in someways an opportunity to say yes – freeing up time for spontaneous fun or just relaxed family time.

We also forget that we need time for just ourselves too. I have been blessed (although sometimes I didn't see it that way) over the last three years with the opportunity to take time for me. I've read lots of books (both fiction and non-fiction), taken lots of runs and even managed one or two solo getaways. I've had the time to see where I've been, to forgive myself my mistakes and to get an idea of where I want to go (and to pray for the vision of where He wants me to go!). It has been time well spent, time I encourage others to take. So often when we have a major life change – a move, a divorce, a new job – we want to take off running, to make friends, find a new lover, make our mark. Learning to step back and see the road ahead is a skill well learned and can often translate to even more success in the new season of life.

One of the things I've discovered from all this 'me' time – it isn't something I'm willing to give up! My quiet mornings spent reading, my snowdays spent writing, my runs – all make me the person I now am. I have no desire to return to that hard-charging career-minded person who always says yes. I find the balance of today is much more exciting, challenging and rewarding.

So go be selfish today –take a few minutes (or hours!) to yourself. Discover it isn't always a bad thing to do!

1 comment:

  1. What a great attitude Lori. Keep on keeping on friend!
    Roger S.